26th May, Horay, horay its holiday de jour time!

My good god, Made it to boracay after 13hrs and leaving at 0430. What a location. Came across by air and sea, to be greeted by champagne cocktails, as we (or just me) walk straight from the whitest and clearest water which I havn’t seen since cuba. Wearing a hotel branded robe I am watching the sun go down beer in hand on my balcony. So much for ‘chavelling’. I’d say its a four star and it aint bad for free!
I’ve checked out the prices – $200 a night pour me, only £5. I’m off to the beach to watch the last of the sundown… Mojito awaits…

Went to a local beach near my mum’s place, don’t want to slag it off but…

Oh yea I’m sure we ran over a rooster on the way, I felt its bones crush… Oh well, I remember last (‘93) time we ran over a dog – intestines an’ all, it wasn’t pretty.

0400am, I’m not gay!
Knackered. Funny evening, sort of. Was walking to the beach bar, and started chatting to the bar girl directing her how to make a bloody mary, then some other staff come by so I start chatting to them. Not knowing anything about the place or resort. In the end I find out he and some other staff are going out for a girls leaving do. Anywho, dropped my phone as I left the shuttle and the guy was going to text me which bar he and the others were.

I end up walking up and down convincing myself I’ve lost my phone and work out what I need to do bearing in mind I am tottally oblivious to whats going on, fairgrounds, bands, bars etc – think greece but less tacky more family orientated. End up forgetting about meeting that bloke, and go for a meal oviously on my own (went for Tapas). Get chatting to the waitresses well, they chat to me whilst i’m eating my meal literally, as I was pratically the only one there. They practically joined me whilst I ate asking the usual twenty questions. Finally got to leave as they all wanted me to marry them – they look about 15 but they assure me they are twenty…

On the way back bumped into that guy purely by chance and end up going to various beach clubs/bars with them. Wich was all good fun, took some photos – cant say I blended in though…

Then I found out they were all gay, the guys anyway. I didn’t take pictures. Imagine the scene, I am at one of the main beach clubs, loadsa of people around but as I was sat – I didn’t dare dance, in the middle of men dancing with each other. I wouldn’t mind but I was surrounded and the girls kept saying go and dance with Romee. Jeez, then all the girls around thought I was gay too. I just let it slide and tried to look interested in girls but they kept thrusting themselves on me.

Then on the way back to the hotel we had to walk down the huge hill in darkness. He was holding phone as a light and then put his arm around me. I thought ‘just let it slide…’ everyone in front was doing it…

But then I rememebered they were all gay.

He also rubbed his thumb on my neck. Oh wel, I suppossed I made his day, but I really must sort that ‘gadar’ out. I should have sussed it when I tapped my number in his phone and he had a picture of himself topless as his phone wallpaper….